How to Return to Happiness: Self-Love with Nikki Loots

Once you’re done with dinner and feeding and cleaning and bath-time and prep time and story-time and bed-time – don’t you still feel like you’re forgetting something? 

Maybe, when you’re done taking care of everyone else, you’ll have time to take care of yourself, too?

We have a message for you from Self-Love Expert and Mindset Mentor Nikki Loots. 

Nikki believes that when you change your inner world, your entire outer world starts to change – and she specialises in guiding women in how to take control of their happiness by teaching them about mindsets, energy and self-love.

You cannot pour from an empty cup and, as moms, we are so guilty of just giving and giving and giving our love – to our partners and children and families – but not to ourselves.

The time has come to learn how to return to your happiest self and fill your cup – with Nikki Loots!

Find out more about Nikki’s incredible journey at Nikki Loots.

Brought to you by Fedhealth Medical Aid – We let you be you. Also supported by Epi-max and Jacaranda 94.2.

Your outer world is a reflection of your inner world. If you want to change anything in your life externally you have to start changing internally first.

Do you absolutely love your life? Do you wake up in the morning with so much excitement for the day and can you honestly say that you live a life that you cannot wait to wake up to? If not, then I'm going to show you exactly how you can start to transform your life by starting to transform the relationship you have with yourself so that you can take happiness into your own hands and start living life on your terms.

I am Nikki Loots, self-love expert and mindset mentor and I mentor women and I guide them how to live a life that they absolutely love by learning how to love themselves first. You see, we all want to be happy, we all want to live a life of meaning and purpose but sometimes life can seem like a challenge. It can feel really really hard, and people do and say things and it really affects the way that we feel and when this happens we sometimes feel unworthy, undeserving, we're disappointed, sad and sometimes we even get angry. And these feelings, these emotions they don't feel good, it's not what we want, we don't want to feel this way but so often we feel like a victim, like there's nothing I can do about it. Life is hard and these things are happening to me and while you may be right that you cannot control your outer world, you cannot control what is happening to you, you can control how you respond to it.

If you want to change anything in your life externally you have to start changing internally first, and that is the way that you're thinking which then determines how you're feeling. You see when you have a thought the brain sends a signal to your body for you to feel the way you think, so if you have an inspiring thought or a happy thought you are going to start feeling inspired and happy but if you have a very limiting thought or a sad thought you're going to start feeling limited and sad and now every single time you feel a certain way the brain is always observing what's going on in the body so then you start to think the same way that you feel and what happens is that we go in the circle from thinking to feeling and feeling to thinking.

Thinking to feeling and feeling to thinking and we go around and around and around and soon we stop saying I feel really down, I feel really down, I'm feeling really down, and we start to say I'm just down, I am down, and we identify with those emotions, and we start to think that that is who I am.

It's so important if we want to change something in our lives and the way that we act we have to change the way that we think first so self-love is so important because like I say we are loving beings and we all need love, but we cannot expect it from someone else we cannot expect someone else to make us feel whole. So, when we give this love to ourselves when we fill up our own cups then we've got so much more to give to others, and we release expectations from those around us.

So, I'm going to share five tools with you five steps to start building the self-love right now. 

So, the first tool to cultivating and building self-love is to prioritize quiet time. I know that we're all living extremely chaotic and busy lives but how you start your day is so important.

If you wake up maybe 10 minutes before you normally do, sit quietly down, and focus on your breath, tap into how you're feeling, scan your body, ask yourself what you really need today. When you prioritize this time to start the morning with stillness and calm, you'll start to see that your day unfolds this way as well.

Number two. Is to become extremely aware of the way that you think and speak about yourself. Remember how you think creates how you feel and how you feel is going to determine how you act. If you are thinking negative things about yourself you're going to feel negatively about yourself and you're going to hold yourself back from living a life of your dreams. How you think about yourself and how you speak to yourself matters so much. If you say that you're not good enough, that is how you're going to show up in the world. You have to start being positive you have to start building yourself up. 

You have to start becoming your own biggest cheerleader so start becoming aware of the words and the thoughts you have about yourself and if you are not building yourself up then you know this needs to change.

The third step. Is just to start treating yourself like your own best friend. How you treat your best friend is exactly how you should be starting to treat yourself. You cannot break yourself down anymore you need to start building yourself up, so you need to start giving yourself the love that you so desperately need and deserve once again. Remember we need love; we want to feel significant we want to feel like we belong, but we can give that to ourselves. So, start treating yourself like a best friend and be a nice person to yourself.

The fourth step is to start practicing gratitude if you want to see more self-love in your life if you want to start to see your life transform, start becoming grateful, start focusing on everything that is good in your life, start focusing on everything that's going right. When we focus on the things that aren't going right, that's where we're putting our attention and remember what I said when you place your attention is where your energy goes, and what you put your energy into expands, so yes there may be 101 things that are going wrong in your life, but can you focus on the five things that are going right. 

The fifth step to self-love, the fifth tool that you can start using is this idea to have more fun so when you start to have more fun you start to see how your whole life starts to transform. You start to see that you become a happier person that you start to feel like i am good enough, I am worthy and deserving. I have so much to give, I've got so much love to give and when you start to feel that way about yourself it raises your self-worth, it raises your self-confidence, it raises your self-belief and when you show up as that version of yourself, oh my goodness everyone wants to be around you.

People love who you are, people say you're really fun I want to spend more time with you when we start to have more fun we start to realize that life is good or maybe it's not as bad as I used to think it was.  Self-love is not selfish; self-love is the biggest gift that you can give yourself and everyone around you.

Remember when you fill up your own cup, you don't need love and attention from anyone else, you release all expectations from those people. You have so much more to give to others and you're a happier person.

Self-love is incredible, it changed my life and I really hope that it changes yours too!